Day 5 – I got my Butt Kicked by a Salmon!


First day of eating on a day off! The challenge was a bit different than a work day because the schedule is not as structured.

9:30 My two slices of15 grain toast with a thin spread of peanut butter.

12:30 after Church I cooked up a single serving of Barilla whole grain angel hair past and used a very small amount of red pasta sauce on it. Just because it seemed like a good idea at the time I rolled up two slices of the reduced sodium deli sliced turkey breast as a side dish. You don’t normally think of turkey breast and pasta together but it was good!

Around 3:30 I was out doing honey-dos with Deb and I started stressing because I hadn’t eaten for three hours. We ended up doing our grocery shopping at Market Basket and I picked up some of the aforementioned low sodium sliced turkey breast as part of the grocery order. I figured there was no time like that moment so I opened the package and ate a couple of slices while walking around shopping!

4:30 I had picked up small bags of “steam in bag” brussel sprouts that are plain as is so I zapped those and had them with a handful of almonds. Last night Adam asked me if I ate almonds but I told him that I didn’t like them- although I don’t ever remember trying them. I did pick some up today and of course they were great!

7:00 – Dinner is a story about a man, a fish and $8 wasted! When we are grocery shopping today I become very daring and decide that I will purchase and cook salmon tonight. You have to know how much I hate sea food to understand what a big deal that was!

I ask the “fish kid” if they have any recipe cards but he says they don’t so I get my salmon knowing I can find recipes on the web. Well as it turns out there are probably 10,000 salmon recipes on the web with varying degrees of grossness. After much effort I find a basic Cooking Salmon for Dummies type of recipe. I whip the salmon out of the package and for the first time I see that there is skin on one side of it. No one told me skin was in the deal.

I have no clue if you are supposed to cook it with the skin, cut it off…? So I call Tom to ask him and he doesn’t answer the phone- thanks Tom! I decide that the skin is disgusting looking so I will cut it off. Apparently salmon skin just can’t be removed that easily. The battle is on between the salmon and me- accompanied by my apparently dull filet knife. After a battle that would make Jack the Ripper proud the skin is off and I am left with a couple of very small filets left that were about a third of the size of the original.

Then I find the bones!! Disgusting little fish bones!! I am back at the remaining salmon hacking away once again to get rid of the dumb bones. At that point I was hurling insults at the salmon telling it that its mother was a carp. When finished hacking again I knew I had a problem. What was left was a pile of pink salmon mush. An inedible pile of salmon mush! An $8 inedible pile of salmon mush! Then the phone rings and it’s Tom! Of course you keep the skin on he says five minutes too late.

So for dinner I baked chicken breast rolled in some plain bread crumbs. I made some red potatoes with garlic as one of the sides. I then used one of those “Zip N Steam” bags from Ziplock. In the bag I put fresh baby carrots, green peppers, red peppers and broccoli. These steamed up nicely and I ate them as is without butter.

Rant about shopping: It is ridiculous how much more expensive it is to buy healthy foods vs. the unhealthy variety. I started softly weeping as the girl scanned the last item. If our President wants to spend some more of that economic stimulus money how about subsidizing the grocery bills of fatties like me who choose to buy good food. Healthy food companies benefit, grocery stores benefit, there’ll be more room for other people that share the elevator with me…


3 Responses to Day 5 – I got my Butt Kicked by a Salmon!

  1. Jason says:

    ROFL about the salmon story. I read it just a few hours after I skinned my own today. For future reference, they will do it for you at the grocery store. 🙂

  2. Tom says:

    Real men catch their own salmon! Then take a bite out of it when it’s still wiggling. Me?…I prefer baked with lemon,salt and pepper………

  3. Cheryl says:

    Funny salmon story. Here’s a great grilling recipe for salmon. Put the salmon in foil with olive oil(approx 3 TBSP), 1 crushed garlic clove, 2 tablespoons Old Bay seasoning and salt & pepper to taste. Seal foil around salmon and grill on each side for 8-10 minutes. Salmon should be flaky when done. Simple and absolutely delicious!

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